A casual dig at a beloved author

On my way to get my allergy shots I take two trains and pass from 3 to 5 little free libraries, which I often raid. The other day I picked up a children’s fantasy novel that is what they call “middle grade” level, so one short step up from “chapter book”.

My thoughts went something like this: “Oh, a book about a boggart, might be kind of dumb but I’ll read it over breakfast and put it back out on my free library.” I like myths and legends and folktales and fantasy but there is a particular strain of very twee UK, how can I put this, just kind of a smug rolling around in fairies and gnomes that mildly annoys me because it has no depth even though it lays some claim to being rooted in some real tradition.

So I read it over breakfast the next day and was incredibly irritated but finished it since it was super short. It was formulaic like a Nancy Drew book level of obviousness, which is fine, I can enjoy that and even read like 20 Nancy Drew level formula books in a row, to anesthetize myself but with the potential for analysis of the formula, the time it was written, and so on.

There was an ahistorical boggart, a loch ness mmonster who was also secretly a boggart shape shifter but swimming in the ocean, a scooby doo episode type of plot, and, mega annoyingly, a brash, horrible real estate, hotel, and golf course developer named Mr. Trout. Well THAT was not what I wanted to think about over my toast and marmalade. But fine. Ugh.

I will skip everything else (like that no one had any personality and the kids were less appealing than any old drivel from Enid Blyton) to get to the worst bit, which was right at the start where the two Canadian children visiting their old uncle in Scotland are being dropped off by their dad, who then leaves for an academic conference. I think one child, or a relative or neighbor, wished the mom were also visitng or asked after her, to which boy child responded something like “Working moms, amirite?” (Not literally but the words “working moms” and the implications were there! )

For fuck’s sake! Did I just died and go back to 1982? I have not heard anyone say that for years and years and I hope I never read or hear it again.

Later on someone says how the off screen working mom actually has a quite important good job doing some sort of ecological lawyering in Toronto. That did NOT make up for the implications of someone dissing the “Working Mother”.

As I put the book out on my little free library I noticed it was written by Susan Cooper. Here is where I shit on your entire childhood by rolling my eyes so hard at the author of The Dark is Rising series, which everyone but me loves loves loves (argh), that I can see my own hippocampus.

Women authors, amirite?

New tiny zine: Girls to the Front

I have a new little zine ready and printed! It is the same size as the “Take the 49” and “Copies” tiny poetry zines from last year, but has extra internal pages.

It’s called Girls to the Front and is basically one medium length poem about riot grrrl.

little zine covers and inside pages ready to fold, next to a saddle stapler

The cover images are a little collage I made of Mia Zapata, Alice Bag, Huggy Bear, and Bratmobile.

If you want one, you can send me a SASE and a dollar, to

Liz Henry
Burn This Press
PO box 720011
San Francisco CA 94172

(put 2 stamps and an extra dollar if you want 2-3 tiny zines – I did a 2nd printing of Take the 49 and still have 1st printings of Copies)

Bad Inventions, linguistics edition! M’Dude’m

I have invented an excellent gender-confused term of address. It is not really gender “neutral”.

Sometimes, when my haircut is just right, strangers address me something like this: “Sir, uh ma’am, uh, sir, uh I mean . . .” and then they trail off in confusion. If my gender presentation confuses people, that’s perfect! I like it to weight a bit more to the masculine side but not to be actually passing as a man.

I present to you the gender-non-conforming, masc-leaning, equivalent to “M’lady” or “Ma’am”: “M’dude’m”.

You’re welcome!

Bad Inventions: Vertical Loom and cat tree combo

It’s time for . . . BAD INVENTIONS! Today’s terrible invention and bad idea is a vertical loom, the kind that you would stand or sit in front of to weave a big tapestry, combined with a beautiful, complex, cat tree for your cats to play on.

Penelope would not have had to stay up late un-weaving her work on Laertes’ shroud if she simply had plenty of cats and an inviting structure for lounging placed on top of the loom. She could sleep peacefully, knowing her cats and kittens were on the job.

The power of glue and wheatpaste

I love to make paper maché piñatas and recently have been working on some cardboard and paper mache furniture. It is relaxing because it isn’t writing and isn’t a computer, hurrah! The furniture is a large cardboard box that my parents had been using as a patio table after moving into their new condo. My mom liked it because it is super light weight and the perfect height for her morning coffee. But guess what, someone complained to the HOA that it looked trashy!

Thus my giant plan to paper mache this 2 and a half foot square box. I added some extra cardboard inside for structural support, but unfortunately only along the edges. Now I wish I’d folded a piece zig-zag and taped it into the middle so the middle wouldn’t sag. Oh well! The two saggy sides just shouldn’t be the ones facing up and there are other flatter bits to be the surface of the table. To add a little extra smoothness I am going to experiment with a thin layer of drywall stuff (left over by our contractors). Then, sand it lightly by hand, then seal it with some spar varnish (against mice and damp), then spray paint, then probably I’ll do another layer of spar varnish.

If all goes well, it will look classy as fuck but we will know that inside, it’s still the same damn box!!

a box covered in wet newspaper on the grass surrounded by piles of supplies, flour and water

Meanwhile on the collage and decoupage front! I used to make collages for zines and flyers and have an old clippings file somewhere in the basement, but I thought I’d make a new one file and run a drop-in workshop at the SF Disability Cultural Center in a couple of weeks. I have a call out on the neighborhood free exchange group for magazines but in the meantime I cut up an old New Yorker that someone put into my little free library. and then figured I would write a little how-to for decoupaging. It may not be the 100% best way, but here is what I do!

The basic idea is you are going to make a collage, but are going to utterly saturate and cover it with tough clear glue, to form a durable coat on top.

Supplies to gather

* scissors
* glue – school or wood glue is ok but Mod Podge is great!
* paper (see below for tips on gathering paper)
* scrap newspaper or sheets of scrap paper (to protect your table)

Optional supplies that will make your life easier

* a glue stick
* a repositionable glue stick! (special !)
* an exacto knife
* Bandaids (hahahah oops)
* wax paper (very useful for putting under your object while gluing)
* a brush, small bits of sponge, a rag, a wet rag

1. Get some colorful or interesting bits of paper
This can be magazines, colored tissue paper, origami paper, wrapping paper, newsprint, napkins, concert programs, flyers, ticket stubs, or other ephemera. Anything is good. Thick glossy cardstock can even work. You can print things from the internet, or draw something yourself.

2. Get a file folder or envelope or two to hold your clippings.
This doesn’t have to be anything special. I like big flat mailer envelopes, which I save sometimes from mail I get, but you can also just grab one free at the post office. A manila folder or two will fit inside it! Or you can use smaller mailing envelopes or just a piece of paper folded in half to hold your clippings inside the big envelope.

3. Cut up your magazine(s)
Cut out anything colorful. A big advertisement may have areas of interesting color. I generally cut around the bits that have people and words, and snip out the scraps of plain colors or patterns. Words can be fun too but you really want to build up a variety of colors and shapes! Put it all in your clippings folder and envelope!

It took me maybe 10-15 minutes to cut everything nifty out of this New Yorker — and here it is:
a pile of small pieces of colorful paper clipped from a magazine, spread out on a manila folder

4. Start your layout
You might have a look at your clippings and the thing you are going to decorate, and pick out a few colors, patterns, or decide on some kind of theme. Then start with large pieces first, and add smaller pieces afterwards. You can tack paper down with a little bit of glue stick to start with.

I used some scrap printer paper underneath my project to avoid getting glue all over the table but then switched to wax paper so that my table-protecting layer wouldn’t stick to the project. Wax paper works really well (or parchment paper).

a plain white mailing envelope with a few bits of magazine ads glued on, surrounded by working supplies like glue and scissors

5. Saturate and cover with ModPodge!
Once you get a bunch of it done or have covered one surface, slap on your Mod Podge or other clear glue. If your paper is lightly tacked down, or is thick, then re-glue its underside. If it is already nicely attached or it’s very thin paper like from a magazine, slather the glue on top and let it soak through.

I actually use my fingers for this because I don’t mind being grubby and I like the sense of fine control and being able to smooth it all down. (Do wash your hands or clean them off on a damp rag after the glueing!) But you can also use a small bit of kitchen sponge (tear or cut it up ) or a bit of rag, or an actual paintbrush to apply the glue.

5. Let it dry completely
Don’t touch it while it’s drying or the color might come off onto your fingers!
After it is dry, you could add another layer of Mod Podge or glue if you like, or coat it with some other clear stuff. If you want it to be super tough and weatherproof, look into different kinds of top coats!

Or, you might need to flip it over (onto wax paper!) and decoupage or decorate the other side.

scissors, glue, wax paper, and an envelope covered in bits of paper

The actual decoupaging step for one side of this envelope was about 10 minutes. I decided to stick to a few colors and big pieces for the background and then slap a little crossword puzzle solution on top. (An unsolved puzzle design will go on the back of the envelope later!) I opened the flap of the envelope to cover it too, which meant putting wax paper inside the envelope was crucial so the flap wouldn’t stick to things it shouldn’t.

I like how it came out!

the finished small envelope, colorfully decorated, smooth and glossy

I may add a fastener to the flap, or leave it open and use it as a sticker pouch in my wheelchair side pocket.

Small envelopes like this are also great if you decorate the “open” side and then glue the “front” side (undecorated) into the back cover of a journal or blank notebook for a nice little pocket.

20,000 A.D. and also now

I was at Green Apple books last week for Charlie Jane’s book launch for Lessons in Magic and Disaster (which you should buy and read) and did my usual browse of the poetry shelves to see if anything jumped out at me. Oh yeah! This book was obviously going to be fire,

book cover with a hippie-ass doodle and the title 20000 A.D.

And yes! Super fucking amazing! Oh my god! In a way that made me kind of squirm in embarrassment because I kept seeing lines I could have written. “He does all of my tricks!” (hyphen-noun gizmos, sprinkled here & there) Even though I suppose it should be the other way around. Rather than worry about that sort of thing I settle on excited kinship!!! It’s like the best hug from a stranger!

I won’t talk about the title piece(s) yet but they are good.

The VFW Crawling Contest blew me away. A horrible & visceral experience as the poem’s speaker crawls for days, blood and sweat, grime, asphalt, trash,

A bunch of it made me think of when I was a kid in Detroit in the 70s and would pick up bottle caps out of the gutter for my bottle cap collection (neatly mounted on styrofoam trays and kept in a shoe box). And the griminess of the playgrounds and vacant lots full of broken glass and cigarette butts where I was right down in it in my bare feet. The thick back of the tongue smell of sooty early spring slush along the curb. And the feeling later on in Houston when I’d start to toughen up my feet for the summer walking on the asphalt till I had a quarter inch layer of callus to protect me from heat and sharp things.

The crawler does it all, is at eye level with the truck tires and beer tabs and keeps just going forward. suffering is matter of fact and relentless. the crawler endures.

i think of all the people on the street and their experience.

“a hot dog
       & baked beans please
               just drop it in the tar.”

Life is disgusting and visceral, there are things about embodiment that we just slide over — over & over. What is it about people that we are animals enduring all of this?

Aesthetics can be the worst lie – fascism in fact.

I used to mock the boys spewing out endless pale bukowski-clone bullshit and called them “body fluid poets” because they went really no further than a toddler realizing barf and poop are icky. It went no where and said nothing and wasn’t shocking in the way they wished they could get to, didn’t disrupt ::shit::.

O Lake of Shooting Stars, the eye-souls
zzzt! zzzt! fall to
              fulfillment beneath thy surface.

I honestly didn’t remember who Ed Sanders was but then with a lookup remembered! Duh!!!! Fucking powerful poet & lyricist & a sort of driving force! Just the sort of zine-y motherfucker –

Floating over the page and fucking around with everything – a kindred spirit.

Of course endlessly relevant as well.

Some bits & pieces:

     and this: that
     only a whining hour past,
     Richard Nixon
     oozed down Pennsylvania Avenue
     flashing V’s from a limousine
     behind a stutter-footed wary pack of marines
                    their
            bayonettes stabbing the January
in a thickery of different directions
             like small lance-hairs
          pricked up on the forehead of a
               &nbsp     hallucinated drool-fiend
                         during a bummer

                but big enough to stab the
                    throats of hippie rioters

                       buddy,
            I picked a yellow petal

          from thy grave
               Mr. Robert Kennedy

and later, in the poem “That is, they WANTED you to think that you were garbage, that no one was innocent, that everything was corrupt”

When the government
of the United States tried
to set up the air
in which to unroll
the rolls of U.S. Steel
Cyclone Fence for the
concentration camps

        what did you
        do for the
        pure-hearted protestors
        shat upon w/ electro-
        magnetic nazinixazism
        by th’ secret Dom-Int police?

What did you
do to ease
the suffering
of those who
yearn to walk
w/ you in innocence?

Yes – grab the flower & share it – I like that there are so many turns to joy or ecstatic poetyness in the thick of oppression.

I went around after the reading starry eyed explaining The Fugs (out demon out!!) to my fellow book nerds and was a bit sad no one had ever heard of them. What the fuck?!!! Even the other genX? Continuing my mission to be a bridge for ghosts.

Bitcoin and organizational account woes

When Bitcoin was like, a dollar or 10 dollars a coin none of this was a problem, but at some point over the last 10 years the value shot up (and up and down and up etc), the IRS started paying attention, and selling off a Bitcoin or two has to be reported on one’s taxes.

Coinbase (a sort of crypto holding company ) only had one type of account and it was tied to a particular person’s name (and legal identity) so as Noisebridge began to get donations in Bitcoin, that account was tied to the identity of a past officer of the organization (the treasurer).

Fast forward to now, when Noisebridge would really like to cash that stuff out and be able to use the money to pay rent!

Coinbase now has “organization” accounts, and there seemed to have been a period where they understood that non profits and companies needed to convert accounts from one type to another.

We haven’t had much luck in the past year of trying to convert the account. It’s a big problem!

If our (past from many years ago) treasurer sells the Bitcoin that were donated to Noisebridge, it will look like they made a giant personal profit and they will have to pay taxes on it and it will likely make their own tax rate jump up. So that is a sucky option.

Would it be bonkers to just estimate what that amount of extra taxes would be, and leave that amount with the past treasurer? And then they basically “donate” the balance of it to Noisebridge. (Which might help offset some of the extra taxes in theory).

Like I said, none of this felt like a problem when it was maybe a couple of hundred dollars but now it is a couple of hundred thousand!!

If anyone out there has contacts at Coinbase who might help us properly convert the account I would love an introduction.

SF Disability Cultural Center opening!

I’m so happy to get to enjoy the San Francisco Disability Cultural Center in person!
Before the opening day I showed up to bring them cane holders made from leather straps, did a training with them from BBI Engineering (who installed their fabulous A/V system) and then ended up spending two days helping the staff prep the space for their first weekend of events. My habit of wearing a leatherman multitool on my belt and having some basic wheelchair maintenance tools on me came in handy as I put together furniture and broke down boxes. The space looks amazing, clean, bright, cozy and colorful, with the huge atrium in the middle of the building full of plants and nice places to sit.

Opening day was super crowded. I got to help cut the ribbon (and kept a piece of the ribbon to tie around my wheelchair arm). Alice Wong gave a short speech about the importance of our communities and cultures, organizing and activism. There was great food provided by Peaches’ Patties. I saw many old friends & met new people as well! The next day I showed up for the welcome dinner & dance performance (also great).

liz and alice smiling for the camera

While access was great in general the space can be hard to move around in for wheelchair users during a larger event with chairs set up so I will likely be suggesting more clearly demarcated travel lanes and an announcement about keeping those lanes clear. To avoid that crush of bodies and keep my freedom of movement, I mostly hung out in the patio in back of the rows of chairs! However, during the week after that I came by a couple of times to meet people – doing an interview for a podcast / article with RU Sirius in the quiet patio, and then meeting up with friends another day. It is a nice space for coworking or writing and I plan to sit on the cozy benches in the windows along Grove Street with my feet up, to work!

view of city hall out of large windows with trailing plants hanging down

Another fun touch to the space I noticed was, in the credenza under the little row of books on display, there is a magical drawer full of fidget and puzzle toys and theragun massagers. It is a space like a small living room where you can lie on beanbags or cushions and sit on the floor or whatever is comfortable for you. I also really love the zillion charger outlets (mostly on the patio).

If you see me there, please say hi and introduce yourself!

liz and maya in powerchairs outside the DCC, flamboyantly dressed

Happy birthday to the kittens!

two teenage kittens curled up on colorful blue blankets

Happy 5 month birthday to Khaaan! and Fizzbin, our adorable kittens! They are sisters from Quizzical Cattery in Seattle. Here they are curled up on fuzzy blankets on a chair this morning.

Fizzbin is more quick, impulsive, and energetic, while Khaaan! is more muscley and bides her time before leaping when they play. They also will both fetch a toy when they feel like it! They sleep together and groom each other very sweetly MOST of the time. And they are very affectionate, following us all over the house, sleeping under the covers, etc. I think Khaaan will enjoy a baby carrying sling based on my experiments with scarves tied across my chest. The only problem is 6am they start walking on my head but we will see if they can be trained out of that!

On a more frivolous note

I have invented a new word useful for all of our political struggles: Snackquity, for equitable access to delicious snacks.

My cats are letting me know about this important concept and asking me to be with them in community and solidarity.

two teenage siamese kittens in liz's lap in manual wheelchair, action shot of one cat leaping

Translating their frantic lunchtime meows:

How about a little mutual aid to OPEN THIS CAN OF CAT FOOD?

While humans get pastries, with their thumbs, we who have paws, just get the crumbs!

What do we want? SNACKQUITY!!! When do we want it? MEOWWWWW!!!

hilarious close up of a cross eyed kitten with its mouth open wide to the camera